This was made easier by the fact that he's also a writer, and our “date” was ostensibly to talk about our careers.But he paid for my drink and told me I looked nice, and it was a relief not to feel like I needed to hide Lucy or make it seem like she had anything less than a starring role in my life.And the weirdest thing was, it was never when she wouldn’t sleep or had a fussy episode that lasted for hours.I wanted someone to witness when she was being particularly adorable: when she’d laugh the minute I started reading her favourite book, or the week when, just beginning to crawl, she’d arch her body up into a perfect miniature downward dog. But what I hadn’t factored in was how much I’d miss dating. When I became pregnant with Lucy after a one-night stand in Ireland, I knew that it would be hard to have a baby by myself.
I loved the familiarity of a fifth date, which, for me, was right around the time we’d have sex.I hadn’t been trying to impress him, I’d just been enjoying the fact that I could enjoy a glass of champagne with Lucy in my arms. So no, this story isn’t going to end with me falling in love with Adam, or Matt, or Jake. And that’s the thing I’m learning: Dating as a single mum is logistically complicated, but emotionally, it’s pretty straightforward.I had been , as a mum and a single woman and whatever else I was at that moment. You just have to be yourself, because you don’t have the time or emotional capacity to hide who you are.Since I don’t have family nearby, I needed to either find a friend who’d be willing to watch Lucy, or fork over £10 an hour plus an Uber ride, for a babysitter.In other words, the price tag of a bad date now hovered in the £100 range.